Think It Over... Creep.

Don't worry. I've still got a Top 5 Friday for you later today [and I think it's a pretty good one] but I just this from our friends at AICN and had to comment.

What the hell is with the movie and TV industries these days?

I know that seems to be a frequent topic around here but as a struggling and aspiring writer, it's painful to see dreck after dreck after dreck green-lighted while I chip away at something new and fresh and fun. See, if I was already successful at this career path, I could just rip off something already out there and be a millionaire overnight [that little faggot's got his own jet airplane... that little faggot he's a millionaire... we got to install- never mind.]

I really don't get it. I don't understand why it's so difficult for Hollywood to embrace new ideas. I understand why from a business aspect, I suppose... the devil you know and all. But creatively, it's a nightmare. You saw my post last night about a relaunch of Beverly Hills 90210. It's a perfect example. It's just the brand name they want. As you read more and more about it, it becomes more and more apparent they plan to start fresh with completely new characters. Then why call it 90210? Branding. It's a familiar brand to people and it's a blatant attempt to cash in on the good will of fans of the first show.

Want some more?

What about the piles of remakes and sequels that are filling up the slates of every movie studio [and some TV studios - Bionic Woman, anyone?] in town?

Take a look at this snippet from an MGM press release...

"MGM is planning an exciting fall and winter release schedule. In partnership with Sony Pictures Entertainment, MGM will bring new installments of two of its tentpole franchises -- the new James Bond movie QUANTUM OF SOLACE and Steve Martin in PINK PANTHER 2. MGM will also release United Artists' international thriller VALKYRIE, starring Tom Cruise on October 3. With the appointment of Parent, MGM will enter its new phase of evolution by focusing on its major movie franchises highlighted by JAMES BOND and PINK PANTHER sequels, THE HOBBIT, THOMAS CROWN AFFAIR 2, THE OUTER LIMITS, ROBOCOP, DEATH WISH and FAME, among others."

Okay... so, another Bond. That's fine. Casino Royale was a lot of fun so they earned some street cred from me on that one. Pink Panther 2?! Did anyone even see Pink Panther 1?! I have yet to ever have a conversation with anyone in the world that contained the phrase, "Hey, you really should check out the Pink Panther movie!" So, in that one we have a sequel to a franchise that probably should have been left alone.

The Hobbit? No complaints there.

Thomas Crown Affair 2? What the fuck? Was there some great untold story in the life of Thomas Crown that I missed in the first one? I won't completely shat on this one because I dug the first one... although that in itself is a remake. Sequels to remakes... what will they think of next?

FAME?! You're re-doing FAME?! Let me guess. It'll be "modernized" into a "Step Up 2" style plot line. Awesome. We don't have enough dance crew movies and TV shows. It's soddin' brilliant, mate.

I'm going to ignore the other two in favor of going...



WHY IN THE HOLY FUCK WOULD YOU GO BACK TO ROBOCOP?!

There are two possibilities here. They're going to slightly piss me off by going back and doing another sequel to a movie that had two too many shitty sequels OR they're going to SEVERELY piss me off and go back and remake one of the most picture perfect action movies ever. Either way, it's enough to make you want to track down MGM's studio head and give him a, "Dead or alive, you're coming with me."

And now to add on to the, "What the fuck?" for the day.

Thanks to AICN, I also discovered that NBC is close to green-lighting a show where Christian Slater plays a dual personality... a Jekyll/Hyde thing where one personality is a nice, kind stay at home dad versus a superspy. Oooookay. And to top it off, this is operating under NBC's new policy of not needing a pilot to approve the series. Really? You sure you want to do that, guys? Christian Slater rules the world and all but... seriously?

And the icing on the cake. FOX is close to greenlighting a new animated series by the creator of the brilliant Arrested Development. But before they do, the entire future of that series will be decided by the network suits watching a reading of the show's script by the cast.

...

An animated series... being judged on a cast reading.

I don't even know where to start with that.

And so I won't!

Let Donna Martin Graduate!

In one of the most bizarre stories I've seen in a while, rumors abound that the CW has approached Rob Thomas [of the uber-brilliant and sadly unappreciated Veronica Mars fame] about writing a remake of Beverly Hills 90210 for launch this fall.

I'm not entirely sure how I feel about that.

I was an off-and-on fan of 90210 the first time around. It wasn't something that I adored but there were times when I didn't think it was the worst way to kill an hour either. And granted, when it hit syndication, I probably saw a very large chunk of the episodes.

I was an adorer of Veronica Mars... even the much-maligned third season... and was crushed when it was canceled only to be excited by the idea of Veronica FBI... and then crushed again when they didn't pick that up. The CW used and abused my emotions on Veronica Mars and I will forever resent them for it. But the idea of Rob Thomas writing for television again... well, let's just say there are few better ways to get me stoked about a TV show.

The other thing that throws the monkey in the wrench for me for this one is Gossip Girl. The article actually claims that 90210 would be a good partner for Gossip Girl... basically filling the other part of a night nicely. While I agree they'll probably hit the same demo, I'd be concerned that they would be too similar. I mean, GG covers elitist rich as shit teens trying to cope in NYC. 90210 covers elitist rich as shit teens trying to cope in Beverly Hills. Is there really enough of a difference between NYC and BH to warrant two shows with the same premise?

The intriguing piece? They reference the possibility that some cast members from the original might return. I can't really recall how the show ended so I don't know who or what would work for that but it might make the show a definite DVR add for curiosity.

Whatchu think, peeps?

By Popular Demand...

As you know, I occasionally take requests for blog topics. And when such a request comes from the Best Man at my wedding, I pretty much am required by Man Law to discuss.

So, he asked three questions... and I shall answer.

1) Houston Rockets are attempting to go 20-0 tonight
Absolutely incredible. An amazing team running off a streak like that is impressive enough and the Rockets just aren't an amazing team. Three-quarters of this streak was run off while Yao Ming was still active on the team which makes it slightly less impressive since he made them much closer to an elite team. But nonetheless, a T-Mac [and T-Mac alone] led team winning 5 or 6 in a row is impressive. I can't imagine the streak will last much longer but if it does, Lebron and Kobe better make room for a third man in the MVP race. The interesting thing will be if they're still on the streak when they play the Lakers on Sunday. That will be a wild one especially since...

2] The Lakers are 1/2 game ahead of the Western Conference and playing cocky going 15 for 32 of the 3-point line last night
The Lakers are at a crossroads right now. While they're still winning, they're not winning impressively at the moment. Their defense is bad... real bad... very bad... shitty bad. You just can't let teams like Toronto and Sacramento run you up for over 100 points. I understand they're playing a faster pace offense at the moment and putting up big numbers too but come playoff time, you gotta be able to play tough D when it counts. If they think they can play the high octane offense and run San Antonio, Boston, or Detroit off the floor, they're sadly mistaken. This is the time to tighten the screws, get the defense in order, stop fucking falling in love with the three pointers, and play solid basketball for the next couple months until the playoffs. I don't like seeing Kobe say "We played well" after letting Toronto get a near win and losing to Sacramento at friggin' home. I hope they get their heads on straight... and quickly.

3] "F'n City Slicker Billy Crystal is going to play for the N.Y. Yankees tomorrow against the Pirates."

Seriously, man? This is what you want to use your last question on? Really? Alright, fine. Why do I care about this story at all? He's a has-been actor who hasn't been in anything of interest in well over a decade. It's the Evil Empire of baseball making headlines again for what really isn't a baseball story. Next you'll tell me that the Yankees will be producing a new reality game show series called "Pitching With The Stars" where 16 celebrities train with Roger Clemens in an effort to become the next Yankees starting pitcher.

Hey... I think I might watch that.

Somebody call my agent!

You Tryin' To Say Jesus Christ Can't Hit A Curveball?

Here's a brief rundown on the news out of Dodgertown as we get closer and closer to Opening Day:

** Clayton Kershaw makes headlines
You've seen them... you know you have. Hyping up Kershaw's killer curveball now known throughout baseball as "Public Enemy No. 1" Thankfully, it appears that Joe Torre has the good sense to let the kid stew in the minors a little longer before bringing him up to the big leagues. But just to whet your appetite, take a look at this hammer...



Lawd have mercy.

** Who's on third?
Nomar's wrist is still sore. LaRoche is out to 6 to 8 weeks. Abreu has an injured ass [completely and totally serious.] They've got Hu taking grounders at third. They've got Young taking grounders at third. And every friggin' baseball rumor site has Dodgers trade rumors for third-baggers. Personally, I let Hu or Young do it. Nomar should be ready soon enough. LaRoche will be back before you know it. I know, I know... they don't like either of those options anyways but I don't like any of the trade options. So, unless Coletti is about bust out a Mitch Kupchak, hold your ground and keep your cards close.

** Tommy being Tommy
The newsbirds were all excited because Tommy stormed the field during his first exhibition game he was coaching today. It gives me a chuckle but it's just Tommy being Tommy. He wouldn't know any other way. I did find his protests over having to stick to pitch counts kinda funny though. They quoted him as saying, "You want to be the guy to tell Koufax he's done? The pen's got it? Get the hell off my mound?" I'd rather tell Koufax than Drysdale but... yeah, I'm glad they've got Tommy doing pitch counts. I'm also glad Tommy's still using small ball to show some people how it's done. Apparently he put a hit and run in motion with Pierre on first, sending him from first to third where he scored on a GDP. Much better than playing station to station and waiting for the 3-run homer.

** 5th starter
Loaiza inched closer to getting that spot with a nice outing over the weekend. As well as Chan Ho has pitched, I still say he's got no shot unless Loaiza implodes over the next couple weeks. He's simply making too much money to get passed up for a NRI.

** Brad Penny pinch hit
Hehe... good shit. Apparently with half the team leaving for China tomorrow, they didn't leave enough hitters for Tommy so in a potential run-scoring situation today, he sent up Penny to take some hacks. Didn't pay off but I fondly remember the days of Fernando pinch hitting and Orel pinch-running for the Blue Crew... or as we call them, "the good ol' days."

Misleading Media

A few weeks ago, I had quite the tantrum on here regarding the irresponsibility of the media when it came to a Black Crowes album review in Maxim magazine that was written without the reviewer even listening to the album.

Another media trend that drives me absolutely crazy is misleading headlines. There are few things worse than clicking an intriguing link to find an article beneath that had very little to do with the published headline. The reason for the tactic is obvious... more clicks = more money... and that's just on the Internet. This practice is in no way limited to the Internet as you can pick up your local newspaper or turn on your television to see it repeated there as well.

What sparked my outrage today?

Yahoo had a headline that read "Ledger's Will Leaves Nothing To Daughter, Ex-Girlfriend"

A terrible headline, right? The average reader who doesn't click the link believes that the late actor was a heartless monster who had no desire to leave any of his fortune to his young daughter nor her mother. "What a sick excuse for a human being he is," you think. "He probably had nothing left to give her after spending all his money on drugs," you ponder. "I bet he left it all to some whore," you speculate.

You click the link, curious to see how this dreg of society betrayed his child... even from beyond the grave. Full of rage, you start to read...

"Heath Ledger's will leaves nothing to his former girlfriend and their 2-year-old daughter because it was never updated after they became part of his life."

...

Oh.

So, wait. He didn't intentionally leave them out of his will? He just... never added them after they entered his world?

Indeed.

And while that certainly makes him short-sighted, it doesn't make him the evil, evil creature that Yahoo wanted to imply he was.

They wanted you to think he was a despicable human being... because it was in their best interest for you think so. Because if you thought he was a bad person, you'd probably click the link to see what possible excuse he could have.

It's the same practice as your local news that promises to tell about a "major disease outbreak in local fast food locales" throughout their entire show only to drop in a 10 second piece at the end of the show letting you know that an employee at a Taco Bell had the runs last week.

It's the same practice that has inflammatory headlines in huge font above the fold and then tiny print below that explains why the situation's not as bad as they wanted you to think.

It's the same practice that the media has used for years to great success... because no one ever calls them out on just how despicable it is.

IT'S THE YEH-TAY!

For the next time someone tells you the WWE in 2008 is ridiculous...

WCW - Yeti à Halloween Havoc 95
Uploaded by scandy

Tsk tsk tsk

Top 5 Friday

Just barely going to sneak it in before midnight! The streak continues!

Mrs. Blue kindly requested that this week's Top 5 not be MMA or wrestling related. You know, that really limits my options! And she won't be any happier if it's some major geekfest like "Top 5 Star Wars vehicles" or the like. This will take great focus to come up with something appropriate yet not dull.

I've got it! I was just reading something about American Idol being subject to the same regulations as "normal" game shows and it hit me!

And so, I present, my Top 5 Game Shows Ever!

5. Tic Tac Dough

Okay, first... I don't see how you can ever go wrong with a show hosted by a man named Wink Martindale. It's the perfect game show host name. It's also the perfect car salesman name... furniture salesman... insurance salesman... basically the scum of humanity should all be named "Wink" so that they at least can make you smile while they're bending you over their desks. Second? That dragon!
Oh my god, that dragon used to scare the hell out of me even though it was the most unscary looking digital dragon ever. If they ever bring this show back, they should CGI the dragon from Eragon in there... yes, the one I hated. It'd make kids smile and grownups go, "Awww... that dragon's kinda cute. I don't feel so bad for picking the wrong square now."

4. Classic Concentration

This show was so damn awesome. It's like Memory for adults who want to win really crappy prizes. But if you made it past the first round, you got to try to win a car by matching the names of other cars. It was sweet! This one definitely needs to come back. I even remember a video game for this game show that I loved as a kid. It always made me feel like a winner to be able to match one teapot to another... like I knew what to do with a teapot.

3. Wheel Of Fortune
I think I always liked Wheel of Fortune because it was the first game show I saw on television that I thought I would have legit chance of winning. I always seemed to be able to solve the puzzles a few minutes [at least] before the contestants. But I wouldn't want to be on WOF now. I'd want to be on WOF back in the 80's when they had to spend their money right on the spot. "Okay, Pat... I'll take that china creamer for $400. How much do I have- okay... ummm... alright, I'll take the ceramic dog." The ceramic dog was the shit! If I had a ceramic dog that I won on Wheel of Fortune, it'd be my most prized possession ever.

2. The Price Is Right
It was a tough one between #1 and #2 because I've always had a deep love for TPIR. TPIR has the absolute best games of all time. The mountain climber yodeling guy? The golf putt that Bob Barker could sink like nobody's business? The one where you punch holes in the wall and pull out pieces of paper with dollar amounts on them? THE CLOCK GAME?! And the absolute greatest invention in the history of all game shows...



Seriously! It's Plinko! If I ever get the opportunity to play Plinko on the Price Is Right stage, you'll have to drag me away from the top of that staircase because I will finally be home! I made the (quasi-joking) comment last weekend much to the wife's dismay that it's my life's ambition to play Plinko... hey, it's good to have goals.

1. Press Your Luck
Really? Do I need to explain why? It's the greatest game show in the history of the world because it gave us the phrase "Big Bucks, No Whammys annnnnnnnd STOP!" Everyone knows the phrase. EVERYONE! And everyone knows the legend of the guy who memorized the patterns and cleaned up on it. The next time the "brilliant" execs at the networks is looking for a gameshow to put on the air... don't rip off whatever is trendy in the UK... BRING BACK PRESS YOUR LUCK!

And until next week, Blue fans...

Let's Make It A Dodger Day

On a day when the Dodgers came from behind to score seven runs in the ninth to beat the Red Sox [in a lowly exhibition game at which point no players expected to make the clubs' rosters were playing], let's take a look at five pieces of news to ponder as we get closer to the season start.

1) Clayton Kershaw making a push for the roster
If you're not familiar with Clayton Kershaw, he's the best pitching prospect in the Dodgers organization and one of the best in the entire sport. Most expected the 19-year old to start the season at Single or Double A but... well... he got a couple innings of work in the big league camp the other day. Dodger All-Star catcher Russell Martin was asked if he thought Kershaw might make the opening day roster for the big club and had this to say, "I wouldn't be surprised. For the first time in a big league game -- wow. He's got just a heavy, heavy fastball and an easy delivery. He's very deceptive. His curveball, it just drops off the table. I think it's the best curveball I've ever caught, to be honest. He keeps the ball down. You can see he's a tremendous competitor, giving up a home run to the first batter, getting into a bases-loaded jam and bearing down to strike out two guys to get out of it. It's just how easy he throws. He's mechanically sound. I don't think he needs to learn anything mechanically. He looks polished. He wasn't holding anything back, he was just going after it. He's only 19. Man, that's impressive. A left-hander throwing 97 with a power curve, that's pretty unique. And he's got a changeup, but he only used it once. He didn't really need it. They couldn't get the bat head out, so why help them? I heard a lot of things about the guy, but I like to make my own opinion. A lot of young guys get called up early and have done well. Hopefully, he can be one of those guys."

Lots of key phrases in there to be excited about if you're a Dodger fan. Things like lefty, 97 MPH fastball, "best curveball I've ever caught." But at the end of the day, the kid is only nineteen and barring a major crisis where we need him ASAP, I'd rather let him spend another season in the minors.

2) Jeff Kent hurt
Kent's got a strained hammy and is out of action for a week. One of the hazards of having a veteran second baseman. He should be alright soon but I'd expect we'll see a few more twinges and tweaks from Kent this season. I hope we have a reliable backup ready.

3) Delwyn Young sparkling at second
And speaking of our backup at 2B, Young was kinda shoved into duty there last week as the Dodgers search for a roster spot for him. He's out of options so they either have to keep him or lose him so with his impressive bat in his ML stint last season, they're going to do their best to keep him. A former 2B who was converted to the OF because of bad defense, he's grabbed nothing but praise for his defense over the past couple weeks. With Abreu hurting as well, Young may be a lock for that backup 2B spot when the season starts.

4) The battle for the fifth spot
So, we already talked about Kershaw but the surprise of the spring so far is the performance of Chan Ho Park. Once thought a major longshot to make the rotation, he has thrown four perfect innings so far this spring and was named the starter for the first China game. If he does well there, the Dodgers may have to give him a serious, serious look... but I still say Loaiza would have to completely shit the bed to lose the spot as he's got the most money invested in him.

5) 115,000?
The Dodgers are looking to set the World Record for largest crowd to attend a baseball game at the Coliseum against the Sox. They added 25,000 standing room seats to attempt it. Whew. All I can think about is how bad traffic will be getting out of the ghetto on that lovely spring night.

More Posts For Posting's Sake

Forgive me. I'm feeling a little drained today. Why, you ask? I give a three part answer.

1) I was up til around 3:30 AM because I had a sudden burst of desire to try and adapt a book into a screenplay. Since I openly admitted that I've been having a lack of inspiration on that front, I seized the moment when I felt it and stayed up until I was about to drop.

2) One of the good things about being unemployed is that you can pretty much do anything at any point. What I mean by that is, for example, if you know the post office is crowded at a certain time of day, you're pretty much free to go at any other time of day you want. So, when I realized this morning that I needed to go to the bank, Juice It Up, and Trader Joe's... I knew I could go at any point today to avoid the crowds. And when does my dumbass go? Noon on the dot. Ugh. Although, I do have to admit it was pretty fun to be bumming around in my sandals and Dodger hat while all the businessmen in their suits were rushing to get through their one hour break.

3] Building off #2, I went to the gym at about 5:30 PM. At our gym, there are three treadmills... with usually anywhere between zero and one taken. Rarely two... and never three. On this night when I strolled in, all three were taken by three friends who decided to go to the gym together. It's all good. I decided to use the bike instead. All was perfectly fine for about ten minutes until I noticed the girl in the middle get off her treadmill and go outside to use her phone. I paused to watch, wondering if her treadmill was going to be free but then saw her friends wave away someone else who wanted to use it. She came back in and got on it so I shrugged it off. Then I notice she's walking very slowly on it... then I notice she's texting while walking very slowly... then I notice she's doing a Rubix Cube while she's walking very slowly on it. I start to get annoyed... but I don't want to be that guy... you know that guy. Then she changes all three TVs to some vapid MTV reality dating show... with absolutely no redeeming qualities at all. Great. I was listening to my iPod so I was still shrugging it off.

Then she starts walking backwards on the treadmill.

Then she jumps off, gets behind her friend, puts her hands on her friend's waist and starts walking with her.

Then she gets back on her own and decides to hang on to the heart rate monitor bar, puts her feet on the plastic belt guard thing, and hangs backwards to let the belt drag against her feet.

Then I notice she's not wearing shoes.

And while I still don't want to say anything because now my workout's almost over and I still don't want to be that guy... it's at this point that I start wishing physical harm on this girl. Like something "tragic" where her toes get caught under the belt and the belt pulls her underneath and somehow she ends up like that guy who goes under the rock crusher in Temple of Doom leaving nothing but a bloody streak behind.

Does that make me a bad person?

Does it help if I point out it's at this point that I notice she's wearing a sorority sweatshirt?

I knew it would!

See, while there's many things I despise about the collegiate Greek system, one of the main ones that continue to affect us all is their tendency to spit out their members into society as self-involved, self-centered, egotistical, materialistic pieces of worm-ridden filth that aren't worthy of sharing oxygen with most of us.

It's a little too much generalization, I know, but dammit, I keep it real, yo.

I'm sure I was supposed to feel better about the situation when she left, walking over to give me the remote to the TVs so I could finally watch ESPN for the last ten minutes of my workout but I don't.

There's a serious scholastic study to be done about the social relevance and contribution to society of members spit out of the Greek system. I'm not the person to do said study because it would turn into a real life Sweeney Todd... but someone should do it.

A Post For Posting's Sake

I read this article on CNET that was about becoming famous via your blog... and of course, as you can tell by the high-browed, worldly content on here, that's exactly what I'm aiming for.

One of the suggestions they make is that you should make sure you're posting daily... just anything at all to give people something new to read if they happen to stop by because if you don't at least give them the option, they won't come back! Is that right?! You treacherous fucks!

Alright, fine. I'll try to post daily. Happy now?

So, in honor of that half-assed pledge, I present a post for posting's sake.

Give me a few minutes here to scour the Interweb for things to write about because I'm drawing a blank [total creative blank as I haven't been able to do anything screenplay-related in days either.]

Okay, here's something... well, I wouldn't say "good" per se... but it's amusing and relevant since it was a topic for brief discussion at family dinner on Sunday.

I've posted on here before some of my fears for the forthcoming Justice League movie and I'm far from the only JLA fanboy getting nervous every single time a piece of news comes out about this thing.

Honestly, the first sign of trouble was the news that they had no intention of casting Christian Bale as Batman or Brandon Routh as Superman.

...

What the fuck?

Why the hell do you make multi-hundred million dollar relaunches of two franchises and then not use the faces of those franchises when trying to launch a third that they're both integral to? It just makes no sense at all.

And just when the thought crosses your mind that "Any idiot on the Internet who has read JLA could probably do a better job than the shit they're tossing around right now"... you're proven dead, dead wrong. One of my favorite websites, Comics2film [I know... big shock, huh?] had an opinion column up by someone proposing another take on the JLA movie. I settled in to read moments ago expecting to be blown away by a fanboy's vision... or at least mildly entertained.

Instead?

Well, let's put it this way. When most people think of the Justice League of America, you probably think of something like this...



It's a Murderers Row of superhero teams. Superman, Batman, Wonder Woman, Green Lantern, Flash... you know, the heavy hitters.

Our friend at Comics2film has an alternate suggestion. He despises the idea of the fucky casting like most of us but he understands the expense of Bale/Routh might push the budget into another stratosphere. His solution?

Use a different team.

He proposes...

Well, he proposes a lineup that a quick 'net search can't even score me a picture of. He wants to use a post-Crisis on Infinite Earths lineup of Blue Beetle, Guy Gardner, Booster Gold, Dr. Fate, the female Dr. Light, Mr. Miracle and others.

Crikey.

Why not just pour money down a fucking hole?

The idea is so bad on so many different levels, I don't even feel like dissecting it. I can't bring myself to confront idiocy on that grand of a level.

So, the moral of our story?

"Just when you thought it couldn't get worst, you went on the Internet and realized the true nature of man is to be dumber than the guy next to them."

And that's one to grow on, kids.

The Good & Bad On G.I. Joe

Oddly enough, it seems we've become a bit of an unofficial source of tons of G.I. Joe movie information. Seeing as it's one of my favorite childhood sources of entertainment, I have absolutely no problem with that. And seeing as I stumbled upon two new articles about the movie this morning, I proudly present...

The Good & Bad On G.I. Joe

Our first source of info today comes from an interview that Dennis Quaid [who will be playing General Clayton Abernathy aka Hawk] did with MTV. Some scary stuff mixed in here. Take a look.

** Quaid is quoted as saying he'll be transforming the character to make him a "Hefner-like playboy."
First impression? BAD!
Second impression? Oh, that's bad. I see absolutely no benefit in making a Hawk a play-on Playa no matter how much on-screen tail that Dennis Quaid gets out of it. This seems like an attempt to make the character younger or in a Simon Cowell world "more relevant." But I don't like it... not one bit.

** Quaid was also given a list of characters to confirm or deny that they'll be in the movie.

Tomax and Xamot, the twins fronting the Crimson Guard? Negative, although he claims they may be in the second movie [that he has already signed on for.]
First impression? GOOD!
Second impression? Probably a good thing. I like the characters but we're already going overboard on villains with Destro, CC, the Baroness, and Zartan. Storm Shadow too [who is presumably a villain.] But I better be getting me some twins finishing each other's sentences in a future sequel.

Shipwreck? Negative.
First impression? GOOD!
Second impression? They probably couldn't have cast the parrot right anyways.

Wild Bill? Negative.
First impression? BAD!
Second impression? Would it really have been hard to toss in Wild Bill as a cameo in a helicopter flying scene?

** “‘G.I. Joe’ is kind of close to James Bond, the old James Bond with Dr. No,” Quaid said of the script he’ll begin shooting soon. “[Cobra is like] S.P.E.C.T.R.E., where they take over an entire island and are a sort of crime country unto themselves.”
First impression? BA-GOOD?
Second impression? I don't know about the Bond analogy but... excuse me? Did he mention Cobra taking over an island?! If we get a Cobra Island story, I just may wet myself.

** Catchphrases: Quaid confirms he does not get to scream "YO JOE!" during the movie but he does get a "Knowing is half the battle."
First impression? Mixed again.
Second impression? I like the nod to fans of the old cartoon but I'm going to be bummed if there's no "Yo Joe!" bellowed at some point.

Our other source of Joe info this morning comes from an interview MTV did with one of the Exec Producers...

** Comic writer Larry Hama is on board. Apparently he helped polish the script into something that he feels Joe fans will enjoy. And according to the exec producer, we may "even see him on screen." Who gives a fuck?
First impression? GOOD!
Second impression? Hama being on board with the script is a good thing. The comics were the best Joe stuff ever produced and he was responsible for them all. This increases my faith tenfold.

** All about the comics? The producer says they are going to largely avoid the TV show and tell the stories from the comics. He mentions delving into the Arishkage story with Snakes and Stormy. He mentions doing the origin story for Destro. Awesome stuff if they do it right. And he says, "this is really all about the rise of Cobra Commander." Again, awesome if they do it right.

And that's that.

Quick Pick Results

Hey, hey, hey... I did pretty well.

So, as a reminder, going into the show...

Picks Average For The Year: 13 out of 27 fights for a .482
Money For The Year: +$21

And after the show?

I got 8 of 10 right last night! Woooooo!

That puts me at 21 out of 37 for the year for a .568... getting better.

Moneywise? Let's take a look...

Lost $10 on Hazelett
Lost $10 on Bielkheden
Lost $10 on Wilson
Lost $10 on Tanner
Won $16 on Leben
Won $24.50 on Herring
Won $65 on Silva

So, I started at +$21 going into last night and on last night's show, I ended up at +$65.50.

And that puts me at up $86.50 for the year.

RECAP!

21 out of 37 for the year for .568
Moneywise - +86.50 for the year

Dueling Ads

Did someone wise and brilliant recently say something about "emotional blackmail?"




And the response ad...

UFC Picks

Man, it's been a nutty few weeks for MMA. Before we get to the picks, a little recap.

*** Randy/Mark Cuban and the UFC trading lawsuits. UFC won the first battle on this front as they got an injunction to prevent Randy from appearing at the IFL show [which I'm watching right now.] The Cuban one is the interesting one as it calls for a court to determine when Randy is free and clear to fight Fedor.

*** EliteXC had the big Kimbo/Tank show. The show was a lot of fun as I believe 5 of the 6 shows that made air had a KO [and some of those KOs were damn cool] which is really what the casual MMA fan is looking for. Kimbo/Tank was a total freak show fight but it was a fun one. And of course, EXC landed the big news of getting their shows on CBS. That's going to be huge for them and it'll be a big fork in the road for MMA as a sport. Success there opens a lot of doors for MMA on network TV. Failure cements them as "only good enough for cable." Kimbo'll be main eventing their first show on CBS in April so hopefully they can find an opponent that will play huge to the press.

*** Strike Force had a show broadcast on HDNet with Bob Sapp in the main event. That show bombed. I was bored, I fell asleep... I woke up in time to see Sapp attempt a Ric Flair entrance that lasted longer than he did in the fight. Bad, bad show.

Anyways... Picks time. Let's see where we were the last time this happened.

Picks Average For The Year: 13 out of 27 fights for a .482
Money For The Year: +$21

Here goes nothing...

Date: March 1, 2008
Location: Columbus, Ohio
Venue: Nationwide Arena


PRELIMINARY CARD
****************

Andrei Arlovski vs. Jake O’Brien
ODDS: Arlovski -270, O'Brien +210
This is one of the most loaded shows that I can recall in the UFC. When you've got guys like Diego Sanchez and Arlovski on the non-televised card, you know the card is stacked. The rumors are strong that this may be Arlovski's final UFC fight but Dana White announced today that he plans to re-sign him. We'll see, I guess. Arlovski is 11-5, a former UFC Heavyweight Champion coming off a decision win over Werdum in April of '07. O'Brien is 10-0 coming off a decision win over Heath Herring in January '07. Sigh.
PREDICTION: Arlovski by KO in Rd 2
BET: None

Luke Cummo vs. Luigi Fioravanti
ODDS: Cummo -160, Fiorvanti +130
I really like Luke Cummo so I wish he'd made the main card. Cummo is 6-4 coming off a couple of wins last year. Fioravanti is 11-3 but I'm not too impressed with the people he's beaten. I'll go with Cummo.
PREDICTION: Cummo by decision
BET: None

Dustin Hazelett vs. Josh Koscheck
ODDS: Hazelett +300, Koscheck -450
Koscheck is another one I'm surprised to see not make the main card - not disappointed mind you since I hate the motherfucker... but surprised. Hazelett is 10-3 coming off a three fight win streak. Koscheck is 9-2 coming off a loss to GSP after running off 5 in a row. He really should only have one loss but he had that bizarre KO loss to Drew Fickett. I hate picking Koscheck but I can't imagine he'd lose. He'll stall it out at worst. The odds are enough to take a flyer on Hazelett though.
PREDICTION: Koscheck by decision
BET: $10 on Hazelett to win $30

David Bielkheden vs. Diego Sanchez
ODDS: Bielkheden +300, Sanchez =450
Bielkheden is 12-5 and making his UFC debut. Diego is 17-2 coming off two decision losses. You've gotta imagine this poor bastard is being fed to Diego to try to get him back on track. He was supposed to be the Ultimate Fighter Golden Boy... the easy lock for the first UF contestant to win gold. If Diego can get back in his game, this should be an easy fight for him. But the odds are too long not to take a chance.
PREDICTION: Sanchez by TKO in Rd 2
BET: $10 on Bielkheden to win $30

Jorge Gurgel vs. John Halverson
ODDS: Gurgel -200, Halverson +160
Jorge is 11-3 coming off a decision loss last October. Halverson is 16-5 on a three fight win streak but in his first UFC fight since losing to Roger Huerta last February.
PREDICTION: Gurgel by RNC in Rd 2
BET: None


MAIN CARD
*********

Jon Fitch vs. Chris Wilson
ODDS: Fitch -550, Wilson +350
Fitch is... are you ready for this? He's 15-2... on a 14 fight win streak! Chris Wilson is 13-3 on a four fight win streak. A 14 fight win streak? How do you pick against that? But at those odds, you gotta take a chance to bet against it.
PREDICTION: Fitch via RNC in Rd 2 to get the next title shot at 170
BET: $10 on Wilson to make $35

Yushin Okami vs. Evan Tanner
ODDS: Okami -240, Tanner +190
Okami is 20-4 and was running off quite the nice win streak until he had a decision loss to Rich Franklin. So, now he's trying to get back on the winning path and see if he can get a shot at the winner of tomorrow's main event. Tanner is 12-6 but will be in his first fight in two years. This is a win-win for Dana. A win by Okami puts him back in line for a shot at Silva/Henderson. A win by Evan gives another marketable fighter in that division that looks like it will need some fresh blood after tomorrow night.
PREDICTION: Okami by decision
BET: $10 on Tanner to win $19

Chris Leben vs. Alessio Sakara
ODDS: Leben -165, Sakara +135
Leben is 17-4 coming off a great KO win. He just signed a new contract and tends to be one of the most exciting fighters in the UFC often to his own detriment. Sakara is 11-6 coming off a win. This should be a fun fight. Both guys tend to either KO their opponent or get KOd so expect the fists to fly.
PREDICTION: Leben by KO in Rd 2
BET: $10 on Leben to win $6

Heath Herring vs. Cheick Kongo
ODDS: Herring +145, Kongo -175
Herring is 27-13 and is one of those fighters that kinda hold a gatekeeper role. They have pretty good records but usually lose to the big names. He's got wins over guys like Mark Kerr and Gary Goodridge but losses to Cro Cop, Fedor, Noguiera, etc. Kongo is 11-3-1 coming off two wins and I suppose can be credited as running Cro Cop out of the UFC. He's one of my favs but I think he needs more polish to challenge for the title. Noguiera's too much for him to handle. But I think he can get past Herring and probably will be a sacrificial lamb title defense for Nogueira.
PREDICTION: Kongo by decision
BET: $10 on Herring to win $14.50

Middleweight Title Match: Anderson Silva vs Dan Henderson
ODDS: Silva -160, Henderson +130
The final time that a PRIDE championship will be defended essentially ending a major era in the sport's history. This should be an incredible match. Ever since Silva debuted with the impressive KO over Leben and then totally destroyed Rich Franklin twice, many have wondered just who stands between Anderson Silva and cleaning out the division. That's gotta be Dan Henderson. If Silva gets past Henderson, Dana's going to have issues in finding a sellable opponent for Silva. He just looks dominant out there. If he can convince Matt Hughes to go up in weight for it, he could see it but no one will give Hughes a chance. If he can get Wanderlei to drop down to face Anderson, that'll sell a ton. If Hendo wins, you've got more options. Hendo's got a great chance in this one. Since it was announced, this has been my most eagerly anticipated fight of the year. My heart says Silva gets another huge KO after Henderson gets worn down a bit trying to G and P. My head says Henderson follows the Rampage gameplan and does enough on the ground to get it to the judges. I'm going with my heart on this one.
PREDICTION: Anderson Silva by TKO in Rd 4.
BET: $40 on Silva to win $25


And that's that. Enjoy the fights, people!

Top Five Friday

Ay yo!

It's time for the second edition of Top Five Friday... and in honor of it being a big MMA weekend [the first IFL show of the year is tonight & the UFC PPV is tomorrow night] I've decided on an MMA-themed Top Five and thus...

My Top Five MMA Dream Matches Of The Moment

5. Kimbo Slice vs Bob Sapp
Let's start with the Mother of All Freak Show Fights. Bob Sapp, the man who has made a living off being a freak show fighter in Japan, who incidentally got his ass knocked the fuck out last weekend in no time flat, taking on the YouTube King, Kimbo Slice. So, Kimbo vs Sapp... it soooooo needs to go down in Japan. For one, it'll draw the best there since they love the freak show fight, they love Sapp, and I can't imagine they wouldn't adore Kimbo. For two, since it'd require a weight class change that would probably be a bad idea for both [although Kimbo could probably do it] so you'd need the "relaxed" rules of Japan. It'd be over in no time flat probably but it'd be a fun first round.

4. Chuck Liddell vs Forrest Griffin
This would be better if Chuck was the champ as you'd have the great story of the heavily favored champ taking on his former student, the huge underdog, in what would be a great brawl. Forrest shows no fear and would stand and throw with Chuck. The UFC screwed this one up by booking Forrest vs Rampage but... oooh, fantasy booking hat on! Forrest vs Rampage... Forrest takes Rampage to the limit but ends up losing by controversial decision. In the match, Rampage hurts Forrest pretty bad at some point... maybe a tweaked neck or something from a big slam. Chuck takes up his former student's mantle to go after Rampage... and wins the title. Forrest comes back but instead of being grateful to Chuck... he immediately challenges him for the title. It's beautiful!

3. Mirko CroCop vs Brock Lesnar
I said it a month or so ago... this really is a fantastic dream match but only if it goes down in Japan. This match has lost some luster for me since Brock lost his first fight and CroCop's heading back to Japan to get back in the groove before his UFC return. If CroCop can string together some wins and Brock gets on track, this could be a fantastic match sometime in '09 though.

2. Fedor Emiliananko vs Randy Couture
Couldn't go without everyone's favorite dream match, right? Arguably, the two top heavyweights in the world going toe to toe for the undisputed World Championship. Of course, with Noguiera stopping Sylvia while Randy could only take him to the limit [and with Sylvia having a bad back during the fight], there probably is some "dispute" to it. This fight may happen this year... depending on how the UFC contract scenario shakes out. It's got a limited shelf life though so it needs to happen quick. And preferably before Fedor ends up fighting real competition and loses.

1. Wanderlei Silva vs Anderson Silva
Okay, Wanderlei made a little noise recently about dropping down in weight class if Hendo wins the title tomorrow night... so he could do the same to face Anderson. Two of the best strikers in the world colliding would make for one of the most exciting fights in ages. This is a long shot because I believe they are on the same fight team but it would be awesome.

Okay, that's that. UFC Picks to come tomorrow.

Mixtape Of The Month: Cover Me, I'm Going In

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Comic Book Movie Roundup

A few Comic Book Movie tidbits for this sorta early Wednesday morning...

NEWS: Justice League movie back on track for '09 release
REACTION: Oh, fuck a duck. I thought the strike had killed this thing but apparently not. The fact that they're already done with their rewrite that they need frightens me because from all indications, it needed a lot more work than that. On a side note on this project, some dude from Mad Max was cast as the Martian Manhunter - don't know if that's good news or not. I'm scared that we might get another X-Men 3 at best or another Batman & Robin at worst.

NEWS: Favreau to helm Avengers?
REACTION: At WonderCon last weekend, Jon Favreau cracked during his Iron Man panel that if the movie does well enough, he might get to direct Marvel's upcoming Avengers movie. See, that news makes me feel ten times more confident in the Avengers movie than in the Justice League... which is totally fucked because I'm much more of a DC guy than a Marvel guy. A JL movie is like a fanboy's wet dream and it looks to be turning into a soaking nightmare while the Avengers movie looks better and better as Marvel smartly builds towards it. I still think they need to do a Captain America solo flick before jumping into the Avengers but hey... that's just my opinion.

NEWS: Deathstroke in The Dark Knight?
REACTION: This rumor got started a couple of weeks ago when at a toy show someone snuck a shot of a Deathstroke toy from the upcoming Dark Knight toy line. The figure design was apparently approved by Nolan himself which made fanboy hearts aflutter. Problem is that with all the rumors regarding the movie, no one ever stumbled upon this one. Today's addition to the rumor is that Anthony Michael Hall is playing Deathstroke which really just sounds like someone making an educated guess to me since AMH has been signed on to the film for a while but no one knows what role he is playing. There was talk earlier that he'd be doing an Edward Nygma cameo to set up a Riddler appearance in the third [or beyond] flick much like the Joker card teaser at the end of Batman Begins. While I dig the Deathstroke character and find it intriguing what could be done in a Nolan Batman world with him, I find this one hard to believe unless it's just an Easter Egg for fans like Mr. Zsasz was in Begins.

NEWS: SHAZAM! is a go
REACTION: During the Get Smart panel, director Peter Segal announced that SHAZAM! would be his next flick. The guy sounds like he "gets" his source material and that can usually produce very cool results. It's an interesting film to tackle and I just hope he doesn't try to get too cute with it. This one will have a very thin line to tread between serious drama and over-the-top. Good luck, sir! Oh, and the best news on this one... The Rock's been approached to play Black Adam which may be the best idea in ages.

As a bonus, I'm tossing in a pic from the new Hulk movie and one from the upcoming Wolverine solo flick as well... enjoy! [NOTE: Hopefully these pics stay up longer than the GI Joe pics that got relocated right after I posted them.]








[MORE NOTES: I decided to go re-find the GI Joe pics for you guys... and I found a new one as well. Enjoy!]

Meet General Hawk - doesn't look quite right to me.


The lovely Baroness


And the not-so-lovely Duke... which won't embed in the post for some weird reason so go check it out HERE

It's Going To Be One Of Those Days

Man, I'm getting riled up by half the stuff I see online tonight... this morning... whatever.

I know, I know... I said that I wasn't turning this into a political blog [and trust me, after reading some of the crap in the comments fields on those blogs, I mean it!] but come on... I mean... come on! How can you not look at this and just be physically ill?

Here's the highlights to really twist your stomach...


AUSTIN, Texas - The two sons of Ann Richards, the late former Texas governor, are objecting to an Internet video published by Hillary Rodham Clinton's presidential campaign that suggests their mother would have supported Clinton.



Richards was governor from 1991-1995. She died in September 2006 at age 73. The two-minute video on Clinton's campaign Web site comes a week before the Texas primary and targets women voters in the state.

"So many women around Texas and America are saying, `Wish Ann was here, for us and for Hillary,'" a female voiceover says on the video.

"Today Ann would be asking all of us to make a statement. She would be traveling to every small town and big city in Texas, urging us all to take a stand, be counted, to make a difference, to make history," it says while a picture of Richards and Clinton appears on the screen. "This one's for Texas. This one's for our country. This one's for Ann."


OH MY GOD! If that's not the most blatantly, sickening form of emotional blackmail I've ever seen! They are truly sinking to new lows. If you can't win a nomination without using the memory of a dead woman and saying "this one's for her!" then you probably would be better suited in another line of work. I can't believe my family is all supporting her... well, I can... but that's more an indictment of my entire family than any faith in her.

Seriously, that's one step away from "Win one for the Gipper!"

I'm expecting Bill to announce he's dying any day now and that his last wish on Earth would be to see Hillary in the White House. It's gotta happen. She's running out of options.

Oh, to be a fly on the wall in a campaign strategy session. It would be the ultimate reality show.

Alright... to be fair, it says the campaign got the woman's daughter to okay the ad but when her sons protested, their response was, "You're not going to sue us, are you?"

AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!

When the hell is November going to get here?



EDIT: Oh, you people deserve so much less than me! Look what I found for ya!

I Won't Back Down

Tom Petty is the fucking man.

I'll pause for a moment to let that sink in.







Everyone got it?

Okay, so now let me show you why. While I was on here ranting and raving about the music industry yesterday, I was completely oblivious to the fact that Tom Petty had already done it for me. His song, The Last DJ, was fresh on my mind yesterday so that may have led to my ranting.

Anyways... I gave you three reasons why the music industry sucks. Tom Petty is prepared to give you ten reasons why it sucks.

The Golden Child

What the hell is going on with Eddie Murphy's career? I've been on a bit of a Dreamgirls kick lately [fuck you too] and he was excellent in that... the perfect blend of over-the-top and sympathetic while still being a complete dickhole. Perfect. Then, of course, everyone knows about Norbit. I argue that maybe he was already signed on for that before he hit dramatic greatness in Dreamgirls. But I'm looking at IMDB and I can't believe the slate of shit that awaits. The only thing that looks promising is a flick in pre-production called "1,000 Words" which has a plot synop of "What happens when a man learns he only has 1,000 words to speak before he dies" - a premise that sounds like it could be quite soulful and touching but could be turned into something far, far different. Considering Brian Robbins of Head Of The Class fame is directing and thusfar in his stellar career has turned in pics like Norbit and Wild Hogs, I guess I shouldn't get my hopes up.

That's really all I had. Sorry!

Just read that he got 15.5 mil for Norbit.

...

Those motherfuckers in Hollywood should be strung up for holding out on the writers while giving Eddie 15.5 mil for Norbit. Holy fucking shit.

In fact... look at this...

* Best Defense (1984) $1,000,000
* Beverly Hills Cop III (1994) $15,000,000
* The Nutty Professor (1996) $20,000,000
* Dr. Dolittle (1998) $20,000,000
* Nutty Professor II: The Klumps (2000) $20,000,000 + $36,633,393 (20% of the $181,166,965 gross)
* Shrek (2001) $3,000,000
* Dr. Dolittle 2 (2001) $20,000,000
* The Adventures of Pluto Nash (2002) $20,000,000
* Shrek 2 (2004) $10,000,000
* Dreamgirls (2006) $3,850,000
* Norbit (2007) $15,500,000
* Shrek the Third (2007) $15,500,000
* Jermaine Bolling (2010) $15,500,000

That son of a bitch is a rich, rich man. He got 15.5 mil for JUST TALKING IN SHREK 3! And they're making a Shrek 4? Didn't we all get sick of Shrek somewhere around... ohhh... the opening credits of Shrek 2: Shrek Harder?

Ok... now... that's really all I had. Swear.

He had a song called "Boogie In Your Butt?!" Why do I not own this gem?!

After downloading Bob Saget's classic tune, "My Dog Licked My Balls" earlier tonight... err, this morning... I feel the need to own all songs by comedians... whether they are intentionally funny or not.

Seriously... I'm done now.

Wait. His illegitimate daughter is named Angel Iris Murphy Brown? Seriously? Somewhere Candice Bergen is smiling since she's still relevant to someone in the world not named Aretha Franklin.

Right. I've made fun of him as an actor, a musician, and his bastard daughter.

Not bad for 16 minutes of effort.

The Downfall of Music Part 2

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The Homogenization of Music

I was scouring some of my favorite mp3 blogs this morning to check out what else is out there in the world and I stumbled upon an interested piece of an interview [in addition to some great music.] I've never heard of this guy giving the interview but he had a very interesting thought process when it came to commercial music that I thought the rest of the world should see so I'm paying it forward.

From the folks at Captain Obvious...


Obvious: Dude, I was surprised to see that you have an artist page on CMT.com. Which brings me to this.. why does popular country music suck so terribly?

Burr: That's another great question. First off, it's always funny to me to see myself there, because it's just an odd combination. But I still take it as a compliment. If anyone's willing to accept my music as it is, and introduce me to a new audience, then I'm game. Anyway, I'm not real sure how pop country came to be this way. I think the nineties and the Clinton de-regulation of the airwaves killed commercial pop as a whole because it just got so homogenized. I mean commercial airwaves is how major labels have to sell their product - that's their only shot because their overhead is so ridiculously high. It's really a broken model... but when de-regulation happened and now 90% of domestic commercial airwaves are owned by two corporations, you have this homogenization that's occurred with playlists being forced down from on high and accommodating less diversity of sound and artists...The people at the top care about maximizing the profit dollar only - I mean it *is* business - and the way to do that is to water down the sound so each song/record hits the widest market segment possible. Pedal steel now becomes "too ethnic." And banjo too, etc. You've got a bunch of people hailing Cash and Townes Van Zandt, but none of these artists sound anything like them. It's a weird thing. I don't fully understand it. But there's plenty of people in line that just want to make it. They just want to sing - doesn't really matter what.

And there are times you just can't follow something so eloquently said.

A little sumpin' sumpin'

There Will Be Old Men

Hrmm.

I hate it when I may be wrong. It really pisses me off and is quite the blow to my eternal feeling of perfection in all things.

But...

I may have been mistaken in my movie reviews from Sunday morning. I might have been hasty and speaking before I had time to process them a bit and wrap my arms completely around them.

And no, I'm not just saying this because they were both successful on Oscar Night. I was really thinking about There Will Be Blood specifically for a large portion of the day.

As I said earlier, my only real issue with it was the lack of cohesive feel... the lack of a continuing narrative from one segment to the next... the thread that ties the movie together rather than it being four or five individual portions of a film. The ending, while very well-done, also felt a little... off... to me. It seemed extreme and out of character. But the more I've thought about the movie and done a little digging on the Interweb to get a sense of what the filmmakers were trying to accomplish, I get a better feeling about the movie. I start to embrace it a bit more and understand more of what they were aiming to do.

Yes, I know. It seems odd that you have to research a movie to figure out if you like it but... well, it is what it is. I think There Will Be Blood was going to be an easier sell to me as I liked the acting and almost everything about it... but I just needed that one thread to tie it all together to be able to embrace what the movie was _truly_ about. I knew the plot... but I didn't understand the point. I think I've got a grip on this one now and while I still don't think it was Best Picture worthy, I can see it being nominated... and yes, I think I would be more-than-willing to watch it again to see if a second viewing will make me like it as much as I think it might.

No Country For Old Men? Well, it dawned on me Sunday night that it was made by the Coen Brothers... which instantly made sense to me. Years ago, Mrs. Blue [before she was Mrs. Blue] dragged me to see some movie that was getting a lot of buzz called Fargo... yes, that Fargo. I despised it. It just didn't click for me and came off as hollow. Years later when I rewatched it, I found myself enjoying it and I've actually seen it a few times lately on Starz. It's an excellent flick that grew on me with time and... oh, let's just say "maturity" for the chance to be both "artistic" and "ironic." The Coens were also behind The Big Lebowski which I completely hated when I first saw it and now cling to like Linus to his blanket to the extreme of having bought a bunch of talking Lebowski bobbleheads at Comic-Con last year to distribute to my friends.

So, the Coens and I go way back in me misunderstanding and despising their work inititally only to find great enjoyment in it years later. When I realized that NCFOM was their work... well, let's just say I looked forward to watching it on the HD IMAX of my mind in 2013 and enjoying the fuck out of it.

I'm still not sold on NCFOM's ending... I'm just not. I loved the rest of it [minus a few snags] and thought it was very well done... until the last ten minutes or so. Can ten minutes completely kill a movie for someone? I drew the comparison earlier but there's been many a wrestling match that has gotten rave reviews that spotlight, "It would have been a Match of the Year... except for the shitty finish." That is NCFOM in a nutshell to me.

BUT...

That being said, sometimes it takes a little insight to bring enlightenment... and after a LOT of reading Sunday night on the Interweb, I think I "get" what they were trying to do. It's sad that it comes to that... but yeah, I think I get what they were trying to accomplish.

Look, I appreciate television and movies that make people think. I don't like to be spoonfed bullshit that is paint-by-numbers... all the time. Everything has it's place in the entertainment world... except King Arthur. Fuck that shit.

So, with that in mind... if I'm correct in what they were trying to accomplish with NCFOM, well... they succeeded. In trying to paint a bigger picture, the smaller details were forsaken and they left behind an audience saying, "What the fuck?" It's a bad thing short-term... but it's only a bad thing if the road ends there. If you take the time to figure it out... well, it can end up being a rewarding experience.

I think I "get it" which makes me smile a bit - at both myself for so completely reversing opinions and at the Coens for making me do so. I applaud them for thinking outside the box... as long as they knew what they were getting themselves into.

I'm being very vague here and I know it. But... well, I feel a little guilty for tearing into these two films now. Both should be viewed so people can decide for themselves. There will be movies, TV shows, albums that I will flatly tell you are not worth the shit on my shoes and should be treated accordingly. These two I'm giving advance warning that... well, you may not like them when you walk out but don't let your brain check out there.

Think a little bit about it... discuss it with others... then form your opinion. If you still think it's asstastic, more power to you.

But even the best of us still have the ability to surprise ourselves... and that's a hell of a thing to treasure.

Speaking of movies to think about, Major League is on. Man, Ricky Vaughn's motivation and drive chills me to the bone as does the director's political statement on a post-Cold War society trying to deal with the harshness of demilitarization.

Or maybe it's just a bitchin' baseball flick.

Fuck it. You figure it out.

Holy christ!

The title of this post was my exact comment when I saw this picture. This is a post-match photo of a Japanese wrestler named "RG" after a run-in with Japanese wrestling legend Toshiaki Kawada. Kawada, obviously, is known for being one of the hardest hitting guys in the business.

Next time you're play-chopping someone and yelling "WOOOOO!" think fondly of Mr. Kawada or he may show up at your house and do this to you.

And the Oscar goes to...

Wow! What a day I had yesterday!

Thanks to a tipoff from a friend from college, we discovered that the AMC theater chain was showing all five Best Picture nominees yesterday for $30. Not a bad deal and since we have always wanted to see all five before the awards, we decided to do it.

Mild spoilers to come so... yeah, consider yourselves warned.

They started off with Michael Clayton. I dug it. It wasn't anything blowaway friggin' fantastic but I dug it. I could probably watch it again if I stumbled across it on HBO or something. Clooney was cool in it as he tends to be cool in just about everything he's in... except Batman And Robin. Is it just me or does that man just ooze coolness? I don't want it sound like I have a Vince Vaughn-ish mancrush on him or something but damn... he just seems cool. Did I mention yet that he seems cool? Plus, it's got the psycho mob boss guy from Batman Begins in it as he plays... well, a psycho lawyer. "Help me, help me, Dr. Crane. I can't take it anymore." Good shit. I'll give this one a thumbs up... check it out when it hits DVD.

There Will Be Blood was next. Sigh. Okay, going into this day, it was fairly obvious that everyone and their mother was calling There Will Be Blood and No Country For Old Men as the favorites in the Best Picture race. In fact, another friend told me there was no point in seeing anything else on the list. So, I was really looking forward to this one. First, the good... the acting in this was awesome and I believe without looking at the list of nominees, Daniel Day Lewis deserves the Best Actor nod. That being said, this movie just didn't do it for me. It was very enthralling at times and I would really get into it. But once it was all said and done, I felt a little hollow from it. It just seemed to fall flat at the finish. There was a very emotional and dramatic finish... but when the credits were rolling, I just couldn't wrap my head around what it all was supposed to mean. I couldn't put my finger on the plotline that ran all the way through to conclusion. Maybe it was just over my head. Maybe I was too distracted by how cold it was in the theater. Not sure. But it just fell flat to me and didn't seem like a Best Picture.

Atonement was next... and as much as it absolutely kills me to say it, I actually enjoyed this one. Yeah, it was a sappy love story but it had some substance to it and actually worked for me. I thought the first portion of the movie was very well-done and had me interested to see how it turned out. The second part wasn't as good but it was at least still interesting to see how things will be resolved. The finish, which some will hate, was okay to me... was logical... and was tied up nicely. It may not have the type of ending many will be looking for but at least it didn't try to get too cute for it's own good. At this point, I actually had this in the lead for my favorite of the day.

Juno was after that. We had actually already seen Juno a few weeks ago but we decided to sit through it again even though they were letting people come and go as they wanted. The second viewing didn't lose much and actually endeared it to me even more. It's a smart, funny, clever flick. It has good actors playing their roles very well and is a movie that will age very well, I think. I would be pretty shocked if they won Best Picture but I would be very happy for them as well. Whoever described it as this year's Little Miss Sunshine hit the nail on the head. It's a comedy with a lot of heart and that's a rare thing in the Meet The Spartans and whatever movie with Martin Lawrence in a fat suit is out this week.

The finale was No Country For Old Men which my friend had complained about going on last since it was "the likely winner." Hrmm. You ever have a friend telling you about a movie they saw recently and their "review" has the line, "You know, it was a really good movie until the ending." That sums up this movie to a tee. There were things about it I really liked as it was progressing and things that I really didn't like... but on the whole, I thought it was well on its' way to being the easy pick for Best Picture. But then, it ended. And I was left saying, "Wait... what?" And then you hear the rumblings like, "Well, that's two hours of my life I'll never get back." not every movie has to wrap up things in a pretty bow to be good. Sideways was a fantastic recent flick that is an example of that. But that one was just too open. It was too much of a dangling narrative with no resolution... and I suppose it may have a resolution if you imagine your own but seriously, if I wanted to imagine my own ending, I'd buy some Choose Your Own Adventure books.

In conclusion, I'd say Sweeney Todd got fucking hosed. It may not have been the best movie of the year but it damn sure didn't deserve to get shut out of this category. I'd say it was even better than a movie I liked in Michael Clayton let alone the couple I didn't care for.

But in further conclusion, I'd say Juno or Atonement deserves this win. I'd love to see Juno win it but I wouldn't be upset if Atonement got it. Michael Clayton is in the middle. It was good... but it didn't knock my socks off. I'd be surprised if it won and I'd think it wasn't deserving. The other two... I can see the lemmings following right along and voting for it since everyone told them how great it was.

I guess in conclusion of the conclusions, when the wrestling websites and newsletters are discussing the Match of the Year... I always think that the basic criteria should be that if you think you'd ever want to see that match again, you should consider it for Match of the Year. So, in the most simple terms, the movie that you want to watch again should be considered the Best Picture. And of course, you probably eliminate stuff like Walk Hard or Superbad because it's obviously not the best acting or the best plot or whatever... but yeah, at heart, I'd say it's the best movie you saw all year that you would actually want to see again... not the one that everyone else tells you is the best movie you saw all year.