BREAKING NEWS!

Well, ain't that a bitch?

After four years at that shithole of a company, I was summarily dismissed this morning... yes, one full week before my scheduled last day. And why?

Apparently, I'm too popular for my own damn good.

And no, that's not even ego talking... that's my cock chuggin' manager talking.

"The company's going to go ahead and let you go today. There's just been too much conversation in the department. Too many people standing by your desk talking to you. You're just a distraction right now and no one's answering the phones."

Got that?

Because other people wanted to talk to me to find out why I was quitting, where I was going, and more often than not, why they wanted to leave too... I was let go.

And I tell you right now that the only reason there wasn't a major confrontation is because they decided to pay me for next week as well. I was so much of a distraction, they're willing to pay me to not show up.

So, in a way, it's a relief.

In another way, it's maddening. Four years, people. I worked [fairly] hard for them for four god damn years, ignoring the shitty working conditions, ignoring the ineptitude of the entire management core, ignoring two years of a "wage freeze" because they were hemorraging money, ignoring lie after lie after lie...

And as a reward for my hard work and loyalty?

I get my access to my computer locked out so I can't even send my personal stuff to myself. How's that for a going-away gift?

I once told my former manager that I didn't mind getting fucked in the ass by the company from time to time as long as they gave me a reacharound.

There shall be no reacharound today. Just raw, unadulterated ass fucking.

(deep cleansing breath)

One chapter ends... a new begins.

And I'm spent.

It's Gonna Be A Bright... Briiiiiight Sunshiney Day

Like the new digs? I thought something a little brighter was in order for our old eyes ruined by years of Duck Hunt and NBA Jam.

So, eight more working days until I blow this popsicle stand and I couldn't be happier. I'm sure there'll be some degree of sadness on my last day though. After nearly four years here, I've made some friends that I'll be sad to not see everyday so I'm sure that'll hit me then. I've warned them all against crying... because that'll make me cry... and then someone will mock me and then asskickings must commence.

This month's Mixtape has a scheduled "street date" for Sunday as part of a musical challenge going on. Markus decided that we should both pick genres we don't particularly know much about and delve into it to find something mixtape-worthy. So, on Sunday, I'll be showing off the world of Jazz while he tangles with the R&B scene. Should be fun.

I'm working my way through this "The Plot Against America" book kinda slowly. It's a tough read as the author has a tendency to twist and tie himself up into these massive run-on sentences. Plus, there's no linear flow as he hops around a lot in timeline by a few days. But the premise is solid. What if FDR's third term never happened and was replaced by an Anti-Semite, Nazi sympathizer in the White House like Charles Lindbergh? Anyone know if Lindbergh was actually Anti-Semitic? I've been meaning to look it up but haven't yet. I'd be more curious to see a broader version of this "What If" story rather than focused on this one family. I suppose it gives it a more personal tone but the wannabe historian in me wants to see a bigger picture.

Song I'm Listening To Currently: None
Book I'm Reading Currently: The Plot Against America - Phillip Roth
Movie I Last Saw In The Theater: Harry Potter And The Goblet Of Fire [IMAX]

And The Oscar Goes To...

Award shows have really started to bug me over the years. I used to watch 'em all... MTV...AMAs... Grammys... Golden Globes... Oscars. Now, I can barely make it through them. And it's even worse when you don't know anything about the nominees.

This is one of those weird years that I haven't seen any of the movies up for Best Picture... so I just didn't give a damn.

Jon Stewart and the Three Six Mafia almost saved the show for me... almost. Stewart was golden as one of those hosts that is damn funny but not so funny as to completely overshadow the rest of the show. And the Oscar going to a song about a pimp? Gold, baby... gold. When that was announced, if you felt a strong breeze through your living room... don't be alarmed. It was just the collective assholes of Hollywood puckering in an instant.

Why were there only three best song nominees? To me, the performance of those songs usually is one of the show's highlights and to have it cut down to Dolly Parton and the Three Six Mafia really watered down an already watery show.

While I value the contributions of visual effects and cinematographers and sound editors... is there a need to have that on the broadcast? It means less to the people at home than it does to most of the people in the crowd. In fact, the only thing I learned from those awards is that a lot of people in the industry owe their asses to Peter Jackson.

Oh... and in case you've forgotten in the handful of hours since it was mentioned a dozen times...

GO WATCH MOVIES ON THE BIG SCREEN! NO TV! NO DVD! NO IPOD VIDEO!

Seriously... is there really no one who appreciated the irony in doing a video montage to show movies that should only be seen on the big screen... for a show that will never be shown on the big screen?

Ten days and counting. TEN DAYS!

Song I'm Listening To Currently: Into The West -Annie Lennox
Book I'm Reading Currently: The Plot Against America - Phillip Roth
Movie I Last Saw In The Theater: Harry Potter And The Goblet Of Fire [IMAX]