Top Five Friday

On a gloomy Friday morning with Encore Love Stories doin' a brotha a solid and showing High Fidelity, one of my favorite movies, I decided to pay a little tribute to the flick by doing a Top 5... which was actually something I was thinking of making a regular Friday feature on here anyways. So, with that in mind and with the screenplay idea I've been kicking around for a few days [one that actually kept me from sleeping earlier in the week], I propose...

The Top 5 movies I always wanted to see a sequel to.

5. ET
An odd choice for sure and one that I don't even think I'd want to see anymore. But as a impressionable youth, I always remember a lot of talk about a sequel where we would get to see ET's home planet. Now, as a kid, that sounded like the coolest fucking thing in the world to me. As an adult, I think I'd rather see the Predator's home planet... or an entire flick based on Planet Spaceball. I mean, seriously... what the fuck could you do on ET's home planet once you got there? As an adult [or as close as I may get], I envision an entire race of ETs going to war to defend their planet. How about the Predators invading ET's home planet? Now that might work out. ET's glowing healing finger vs the Predator's spear of death... and I don't mean that in a sexual way. Maybe that's the ticket.

4. Fletch
Yes, I am aware they made a sequel to Fletch [which actually is pretty kickass... go watch it.] But they need more. Fletch should have been an entire franchise. It could've spanned decades with its total greatness. It could have been like the Bond movies where when Chevy Chase got too old, you just swapped in a new actor. Apparently they tried to relaunch this series a few years ago with Kevin Smith at the helm... but Kevin Smith really wanted Jason Lee to play the lead and at the time, the studio had no fucking clue who he was. Isn't it ironic... don'tcha think? I don't know if I would have cast him either. He seems too over-the-top to play insurance agent Harry S. Truman or John Cocktoseorn. I'm not sure who I would sub in in that spot. Maybe that's a good Top 5 for next Friday.

3. Tango And Cash
Oh, fuck you too. Tango And Cash is a criminally underrated action flick. Kurt Russell and Sly with a scorching hot Teri Hatcher?! Sign me up! I mean... we got sequels to a ton of crappy action flicks from the 80's and 90's so why can't we get some sequels for the good ones. It's been a long time since the original came out but it's not like Stallone's doing anything but making sequels to his old shit right now. And Kurt Russell hasn't done anything of note since Tombstone. Come to think of it, neither has Val Kilmer. Maybe we need a Tombstone seq- wait, that won't work. TOMBSTONE PREQUEL! BOOK IT, HOLLYWOOD!

2. Friday
Yes, I realize there was a Friday sequel... maybe two or three of them at last count. BUT... there's never been a _true_ Friday sequel. They whored out that series for a few fucking dollars instead of treasuring the utter brilliance and charm of the original. I saw that movie countless times during my freshman year of college and it is, without a shadow of a doubt, one of my favorites. I want another Friday. I want another day where you ain't got no job and you ain't got shit to do. I want Ice Cube and Chris Tucker sitting on a fucking porch, smoking weed, and watching a day in the neighborhood. How hard is that? Is that too much to fucking ask? I'm irritated by this one... don't mind me.

And the #1 sequel that I want to see...

1. The Goonies
HEEEEEY YOUUUUU GUYS! Okay, what is it with long-rumored sequels from my youth? For ages, we've heard about a sequel to this being made. Several months ago, I stumbled upon a script online that someone claimed was _the_ official pitched script for the Goonies 2 movie that seemed to follow Sean Astin in interviews during the LOTR media blitz. It was golden. It was incomplete... but golden. It starts with a flashback of One Eyed Willie torturing some poor bastard who wants to join his pirate crew. Then we get Chester Copperpot's son trying to buy the map from the original from Mikey who owns a... I think it was a pawn shop. Mikey and some chick are getting married and we get to see the reaction of grownup Data, Chunk, and Mouth as they receive the invitation. So, the basic gist is that they're all going to get together at Mikey's wedding and ultimately have another adventure. IT'S GOLD! IT'S BRILLIANT! I WANT IT ON MY LOCAL CINEPLEX SCREEN TOMORROW! MAKE IT SO!

And that's that. Enjoy your weekend.