What A Wonderful World

I work with interesting people.

Most people can't say that, I don't think. Most places I've worked, the people were quite drab... or at least, they played that role very well so that people thought they were "normal."

Here? There's very few that are "normal" - and they're quite proud of that fact. And why shouldn't they be? All corporations these days like to hold up "diversity" as a badge of honor while showing photos of carefully selected employees to represent all the ethnic colors of the rainbow. Odds are, they're probably not even real employees.

Side note - one of my former places of employ once decided that they wanted to put a photo up on the company website to put a human face on the voices that people got when they phoned into our call center. They ended up selecting a rep who was absolutely terrible at her job, had horrific attendance, and was generally someone to be held up as a "what not to do" example. Instead, they plastered her smiling face on the website because they though it would soften our image to have a smiling young lady's photo up. What a wonderfully fucked up world we live in.

Back to the matter at hand...

The next time your company tells you how diverse they are, take a look around you and see if they're full of shit. It's fairly easy to tell - but it'll give you a chuckle nonetheless.

Now the place I work? They can claim diversity with a straight face.

Got tattoos running up and down your arms and neck where everyone can see them? We want you.

Metal appendages hanging from lips, nose, eyebrows, ears, chin, etc? You're right up our alley.

Not white? You'll fit right in.

Not straight? Yep, you too.

Those are just skin-deep examples of diversity though.

Let's keep it real, yo. I work with a Ninja.

I'll give you a sec to let that sink in.

Yep, I work with a Ninja. A legitimate, actual Ninja. Someone who went to China, slept on floors in a dojo, and went through the full training requirements to be declared a legit Ninja.

One more time...

I work with someone who could theoretically put on their resume - Professional Ninja.

You want more?

I work with someone who ate a hissing cockroach to get to the front of the line at an amusement park.

More?

I work with someone whose life goal is to move to China and teach English to kids.

More?

Creativity is in the air - writers, film makers, artists, photographers, musicians. Everyone's got a dream they're chasing.

More?

They like to call me Optimus. Don't ask.

More?

Midgets. 'nuff said.

Ahhhh... midgets, freaks, and ninja, oh my.

I really do hate people - I do... but sometimes, just sometimes... I love the world we live in.